


13 Things Your Consulting Detective Won't Tell You, John Watson

by Jellybean728



Series: 13 Things [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, Pre-Slash, unrequited love sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-15
Updated: 2012-11-15
Packaged: 2017-11-18 17:51:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/563757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jellybean728/pseuds/Jellybean728
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part two of a series of ficlets inspired by the recent Reader's Digest articles.  This one is a slightly more personal list of things Sherlock won't tell John.</p>
            </blockquote>





	13 Things Your Consulting Detective Won't Tell You, John Watson

**13 Things Your Consulting Detective Won't Tell You, John Watson**

1\. Thank you, John, for so many things, but first and foremost, for believing in me despite all evidence to the contrary.

2\. I don't think you're an idiot, no matter how many times I tell you otherwise. I do have some idea how much work and intelligence it requires to finish medical school and become a doctor.

3\. I know you wish I took better care of myself because you care about my well-being. I don't dismiss you because I don't care. When you concern yourself with how I'm feeling, you bring back painful memories about my mother that I'd just as soon not recall. Incidentally, this is much the same reason I shout at Mrs. Hudson on occasion.

4\. It's not that I detest your sister, John, or wish her ill. But I have been where she is, and I know what it takes to overcome an addiction. She hasn't got it, John. Not right now, at least, and I hate to think of your hope for her recovery to be crushed repeatedly.

5\. Nor is it that I dislike your girlfriends. It's that I question whether you're entirely certain what you're looking for in a partner beyond a willingness to say yes when you ask for a date. None of the women you've dated since I've known you seem particularly well suited to you.

6\. Yes, I sincerely deleted things like the solar system from my mind because I thought it took away from The Work. It was your astonishment that caused me to reconsider that decision and create my Mind Palace. I know you find it strange, possibly stranger than my deleting facts from my mind, but I believe you were right, John, and that this new method will help me in future cases.

7\. I'm sorry that I hurt you with Irene and Moriarty. I was telling you the truth, it wasn't what you thought. And when I pretend that I don't understand why Irene and Moriarty made you so upset, I'm lying. (You're lying too, of course, because you haven't yet accepted why you were so upset by it.)

8\. I'm also sorry that I hurt you with The Fall, but I am not sorry that I did it. I could think of no other way to save you, and Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade, and even if you never forgive me I would do it again today to keep you safe.

9\. Yes, some of your jumpers are truly as hideous as I have stated. Some, however, suit you very well.

10\. When you are having a nightmare about Afghanistan, and I can always tell because of the way you shout, which is a mix of fear and anger and disgust and a desire to make it stop that leaves you hoarse, I play the Fairy Lullaby on my violin. I overheard you singing it to Harry one night when she was having a particularly bad day, and I deduced that your mother must have sung it to you when you were children. It soothes you, even though you don't know I'm doing it.

11\. When I am having a nightmare, John, it is almost surely about you, and Moriarty's plans to burn the heart out of me.

12\. I'm not as asexual as I've led you to believe. Some day, I hope, you will realize you are not as heterosexual as you believe either.

13\. I have loved you for far longer than even I can recall.


End file.
